We need a break

These poor kids. They have been sick for over a month now. Sara has been the sickest. She has had the flu 2 times. Right now she has a terrible cough and fever. She's been sick since Wednesday and it's now Saturday. Every morning she gets up I keep hoping that today will be the day she gets better but she's just been getting worse. Maybe tomorrow will be the day.

So far no one else is sick and it's some kind of miracle. I'm not sure how we can stay well at this point. I thought it was under my control, that if I kept them away from large groups or sick kids and use hand sanatizer or hanatizer as Sara calls it, that we wouldn't get sick but we're still sick. So it's just something we have to live through I guess.

Sara needs extra comfort while she's sick and I feel sad that I'm not able to give it to her. She waits for her Dad to come home to have someone to sit and hug her. I've been trying really hard to keep Brennan well by not having her sit next to us coughing on us and so far he's not sick. I hope it stays that way, a baby with her cough would not be in good shape.

I have feelings of guilt because I feel like I'm only half the parent to her that I was before. I only have time to read to her a fraction of the time I used to. Her needs that were always met are sometimes not met or very delayed. Juggling two kids is quite a bit harder than I ever imagined. I can't imagine what people do with more than two kids.

I've tried to carve out special time that I take her places and do things but it seems like it's just not enough. I try every day to sing to her, tickle her, and read at least one book in addition to taking care of her basic needs everyday such as bathing, tooth and hair brushing, sheet changing, dressing, feeding, etc. I'm really thankful she has Dan and I'd really be worried about her if she didn't have him. Brennan takes up a lot of my time but at least Daddy always has time for her.